We are quickly approaching the season of giving. The greatest gift a person in recovery can give themselves at this time of year is a solid plan for staying sober and mentally healthy. Despite being “the most wonderful time of the year,” the holiday season can also be very challenging for people who have faced mental illness and addiction. For 35 years, Cottonwood in Tucson, Arizona, has treated people with mental health and substance use disorders,and we have some tips for maintaining your recovery during the holidays.
Know Your Triggers
When you think about the upcoming festivities, what do you anticipate could be challenging? There are many different aspects of the winter holidays that can cause stress and become temptations for relapse. Some of these include:
- Painful feelings – trauma is exceedingly common among people who have struggled with addiction and mental illness. Grief is also felt more acutely at the holidays, when people reminisce about past celebrations with people who have since died or who are no longer in their lives. The holidays can remind people of these painful experiences.
- Interacting with toxic people – not everyone has experienced trauma within their family, but this does not mean that they don’t encounter toxic people at holiday events. Family members, friends and work colleagues may pressure individuals in recovery to deviate from self-care routines, have a drink, or engage in other practices that aren’t good for them, in the name of celebrating together.
- Exposure to alcohol – whether or not a person has an alcohol use disorder, drinking and being around people who are heavily indulging isn’t generally good for a person who is attempting to maintain their mental health. If they are also trying to stay sober, the abundance of alcohol and pressure to drink at some holiday events can be a huge trigger.
- Hectic schedules – one of the first things people in recovery are taught is to add structure and routine to their lives. The predictability and stability this adds to a person’s life is just as valuable during the holidays, as it is the rest of the year. While it might be tempting to skip recovery meetings, therapy, calling a sponsor, exercising, and eating healthy, abandoning your routine can place you in danger of relapse.
- Isolation – the simplest solution for avoiding the issues listed above would seem to be skipping all of the seasonal festivities entirely, but if these events aren’t replaced with alternate ways to connect with others, it can leave a person in recovery feeling lonely and bored, which are also relapse triggers.
- Winter blues – not only can the holidays themselves be triggering, but seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is a type of depression that hits some people hard in the winter months. SAD is believed to be caused by the decrease in sunlight and the resulting drop in Vitamin D levels in the body.
Have a Plan
It can feel as though there is no good solution for the stress of the winter season, but having a solid plan can make it easier to navigate the challenges that you might encounter. Putting a name to your concerns is the first step in developing a plan to maintain your recovery into the new year. After that, you may also find it helpful to:
- Set some limits – you don’t have to accept every invitation you receive. You are allowed to decline invitations for any reason. If you feel like the people, location, availability of alcohol, or something else about an event isn’t right for you, then you have every right to make the choices that best support your recovery. This might mean skipping events or choosing not to stay for the full duration.
- Communicate your needs – if you really want to attend a particular event but have concerns, talk with the host. Explain what worries you, whether it is the presence of a toxic person, the access to alcohol, or your ability to be around a large group for a long period of time. Chances are you’ll be able to work out a plan to alleviate these concerns.
- Bring a support person – it might be an option to bring someone with you who is also in recovery or who understands your recovery journey and can help to buffer some of the stressors you could experience during an event.
- Take care of yourself – if therapy, recovery meetings, a consistent routine, healthy heating, working out and solid sleep have been your keys to recovery, don’t abandon them now. In fact, some people do more of these things in the final months of the year to combat seasonal depression, holiday stress, and trauma triggers.
- Make new traditions – choosing to skip events that aren’t right for you is commendable, but sitting at home alone isn’t a good alternative. Look for other ways to connect with people, such as volunteering in the community, holding your own gatherings for loved ones, finding spiritual events to attend, or taking a trip.
At Cottonwood, we recognize that recovery is different for everyone. Our caring team of trauma-informed professionals work with clients and their support systems to build individualized treatment plans that address their unique needs, not only at the holidays, but also throughout the year.
